Train through the Alps was very slow, but the views were lovely, all sharp, pointy mountains and lush green valleys. It arrived into Milan a little later but we had plenty of time to find our connecting train and settle in. It left on time and quickly zoomed up to 300kph (for those of you still using miles per hour, it translates as “flippin’ fast”).

It went via Bologna, home of the spag-bol and then via some impressively long tunnels arriving into Florence on time. Florence was, first of all, HOT ! Not just normal British summer hot where you might think about wearing shorts and a t-shirt, but European hot where the tar begins to melt and you realise that the bit at the base of your spine, is really a gutter for the sweat. (Ironically, Florence turned out to be nowhere near as humid and sticky as Rome, but I am getting ahead of myself).

Anyhow, after getting a little bit lost we eventually found the Botticelli hotel nestled down a back alley. It was very nice, with a tiny room, random air conditioning and lovely, lovely staff. It was in a perfect location, just near a gluten-free ice cream shop.

We wandered to Ponte Veccio , looked at all the gold shops on it, found where we would pick up the tour the next day, then ate a pizza (what else), and retired for an early night.

Next day we met our tour guide, who was to show use the heights and gardens of Florence. We walked up some impressive gradients, bumped into Galileo’s house (which was pretty fab) and eventually arrived at a church on top of a hill. It was managed by some monks, and I imagine when they are told they have been posted to Florence they must bounce with delight – a pretty cushy number !

After the tour we had a coffee in a super-cool cafe overlooking the river. Inspired by our successful morning we booked a coach tour to Pisa that afternoon. We grabbed a quick bite to eat then walked to the coach stop. About 75 people were on the tour, filling the coach and straining the air conditioning but it got us to Pisa about 90 minutes later.

Pisa is special. The town isn’t much, at least what we saw of it, but the square where the Tower and Basilica are is superb. We had a guided tour of the church and the square, then some of the people went up the tower but Belinda and I didn’t. We took photos, wandered around, had ice creams and generally took it easy – did I mention it was hot ?

Back in Florence we had a tourist meal in an outside cafe, spoiled by a child playing a screeching violin in my ear, but maybe I am just getting old and grumpy. Anyway after the meal we had a wander then retired, hot, tired and happy to the hotel.

The next day we got up early had brekky and walked the 10 minutes to the Doumo, then spent a further 10 minutes walking to the back of the queue (I kid you not). After about 90 million years we eventually got into this towering Basilica and looked around and then looked at each other and said, probably none too quietly, “Is this it?”

Now, everything in Florence costs to see it, except the Doumo, so, everyone goes to see it, even though it is not very good, only big. The outside is nice, all black and white and green, but the inside – nah, not really !

After that disappointment, we when to Basilica Lorenzo – a small but perfectly formed church. Stunning to look at, good information, friendly curators, a perfect antidote to the Doumo and a rather special place. After that, we wandered the market, grabbed some lunch and walked down to Piazza Signoria . FULL of people and full of heat, so we didn’t stay long but walked to Santa Crocce. This was an interesting museum, which details depictions of the flood of 1966 and the renovations done since – good value. The church attached is the burial place of important Italians, including Fermi, Galileo, Machiavelli.. Really interesting.

We had dinner in a fish restaurant, where the staff and customers seemed to drink Prosecco at the same time gossiping to each other – food was excellent though and the service faultless ( It may have got worse as the evening wore on though ! )

Tomorrow, the Eternal City beckons ….

A lazy morning in Florence saw us picking up the now standard, Italian train – very fast, quiet and clean with none of those weird smells you get with the Virgin Pendelino trains we have in the UK. We arrived in Rome at around 2pm and were picked up at the station. We had arranged with the accommodation to have someone meet us, and it turns out this was a “good thing” since the apartment was no where near where it was supposed to be !

Anyway, we settled in and had a small exploration of the neighbourhood. It turns out we were just next to the Tiber, almost directly over the river from the Vatican. We found a gluten-free stall where we had a spot of lunch and then mapped out a route to the nearest Metro station in preparation for future days.

We then returned to the apartment to await the arrival of Lucia and Harrison, or ‘the children’ as they became known. We waited…and waited…and waited…had dinner…waited..watched Italian TV (not good, not good at all)…waited…and eventually, at around 12:30am, they arrived – only 5 hours late ! (We had been kept informed of the plane delays, specifically Lucia’s from Paris, Harrison’s had arrived at 7pm as expected, but he had sat in the airport and waited for her. Either he is a sweetie for waiting, or he didn’t want to be alone with Belinda and I in the apartment – I will leave it to the reader to draw their own conclusions !)

After a good sleep we went sightseeing the next day, but not until a rat had been spotted through the window of the apartment. We are on the 2nd floor, so we were not worried. We went first to the Spanish Steps. Lots of people, lots of steps and that is pretty much it, not sure what all the fuss is about. We then wandered towards the Trevi Fountain during which the next rat was seen, scampering along the gutter and down a drain. Big cities always have rats, so we were not worried.

The Trevi Fountain (trans. Trevor the Fountain) was, like the Spanish Steps, full of people but also full of a quite magnificent fountain. The Piazza was really too small to hold such a creation, so you couldn’t really see it in its full glory, but it was very good indeed.

We then went, via an ice-cream shop, to the Pantheon. This was billed as the best free building in Rome, and that is not a lie – it is quite simply breath taking !! The inside was stunning with ceiling panels, statues, marble flooring – just brilliant. It was, however, at this point that we began to realise that Rome will turn anything into a church no matter how old, how venerable, and how un-churchy it’s original use was. Still, at least it was preserved and still looking magnificent after 2000 years.

After returning to the apartment for a rest, we ventured across the river for a walk. The original aim was to get to a park area, but we were foiled by dead ends, but we did manage to get Belinda to squeal, literally squeal, when she stepped back to read a sign and discovered rat number 3. It was already dead, but squished beautifully when she stood on it. My, how we laughed, well three of us did anyway.

We recovered with a beer in Trastevere, and return for a well earned sleep.

The next day we got up VERY early, caught the Metro to the mainline station and caught the train the Naples – today was Pompeii day ! Train was up to the usual high standards as it whizzed south to Naples. We arrived, dropped the bag at the hotel and then grabbed the Circumvesuvious train to Pompeii. It took about 35 minutes, and was like sitting in a noisy greenhouse as the sun beat down through the windows – I must have lost a few litres of sweat in the half an hour !

Now much has been written about Pompeii, it has been in books, films, plays and probably alternative dance for all I know, but the point is that the visitor knows almost exactly what to expect. That, I think, spoils it somewhat. It is still stunning, marvellous, gripping and awe-inspiring but you knew it was going to be that anyway.

The roads were hard on your feet, and the sun beat down mercilessly. It was hot and you yearned for some sensible information to read about the building you were looking at. The amphitheatre was closed in preparation for a concert that night which was VERY annoying since that was one place I dearly wanted to see.

You might get the impression that we didn’t like it, but that is not true, it was superb, it is just that, I at least, wanted to see something I had not seen before…

Anyhow, we got back to Naples and checked in properly to the hotel. The rooms were ‘wacky’, each one themed. Belinda and I had a seaside one, and a the others had a pop music one, complete with a scary picture of Michael Jackson staring down at them !

We went out for a look around, but Naples , at least in first glance around the train station, is a dump. Litter everywhere, filthy streets – not very inviting at all. We had a posh drink in a posh hotel, on the rooftop terrace, then had a nice meal at the side of a modern Piazza, we then retired ready for tomorrow.

The next day was CANCELLED ! It was raining hard, too wet to go to Herculeam (we were rather tired of Roman ruins by then) and too wet for the buses to go up Vesuvius. This second was very hard to take, especially for the two geologists, and put a damper on the whole Naples trip. Eventually we returned to Rome, and we will mention no more about volcanoes.

Today was visit The Vatican day, we had it all planned, we walked the 10 minutes or so to the museum, fought off all of the ticket touts and “jump the queue” people, claiming we were British and we liked to queue and arrived at the tail end of a line of people. It snaked around the corner and then just went on and on into the far distance; it made the one in Florence look like the queue for the No 17 bus !

We soon abandoned this plan since the queue was in direct sunshine and the temperature was hovering around 175C, and was moving with tectonic slowness. The children only have two days before they must depart so we hurried to the Metro and jumped on a Colosseum bound train. For the Colosseum you buy a triple ticket for the Forum, Colosseum and Palatine hill. The queue to buy tickets at the colosseum was huge so we wandered to the Palatine and bought them there.

After 30 minutes we were in, equipped with an audio/visual gadget of confusing modernity – thank goodness for the children. We wandered around, discovering that the gadget was useless, the Forum was big, the Vestal Virgins were buried alive if they became Vestal ex-virgins and that the Romans could build very big things ! The Forum was huge, spread over many acres. The explanations were not great but the whole place was impressive none the less.

Eventually the heat drove us out and we retired to the world’s most expensive ice-cream shop. The ice cream was nice, the orange juice was cold, and we were entertained by sparrows and lizards while we sat looking out over at the colosseum. When the waiter came over, we asked for the bill, “but a small one, please” I said – and lo and behold he returned with a tiny piece of folded paper. Very funny chaps these waiters.

With the wallet decidedly lighter we joined a long queue to get into the colosseum. It moved quickly and we eventually entered after about 30 minutes. (A rather irate American wanted to queue jump, but the ticket man shooed him away).

The outside of the colosseum is brilliant: imposing, ancient, inspiring, and the inside lives up to the billing. It is superb. A huge space with complex walkways and passages, especially the “underground” bits. We had another audio/visual thingy – much better this time, and we were all filled with historic information about gladiators, lions, awnings and Roman crowd control.

The next day was REALLY going to be Vatican day. We had decided that an organised tour was the way to go, so we coughed up the money and joined an excellent tour of the Vatican museum with a guide called Grant. Informative, entertaining and detailed, it vastly increased our enjoyment of the 3 hours as he pointed out important works amid the enormous number in the museum. The Sistine Chapel was stunning, although I preferred the wall panels to the ceiling, but that may be because I am a philistine – ho hum.

St Peters basilica was huge, and intensely decorated – a normal church could fit in one of the small side chapels. It was too big to see properly, but was a most impressive building, fitting in with St Peter’s square perfectly.

We returned to the apartment via the Metro and the children finished packing and jumped into a taxi for the trip to the airport and then home. Belinda and I decided to go out for a meal so we wandered the back streets of Rome in search of a nice place that does ‘senza glutine’ stuff. We tried and failed to find one, encountering vague rudeness, scary staring people and full tables. Eventually, in the road behind our apartment, we sat down and had a superb pizza with friendly, funny staff, and cold beer.

Our last full day brought, yet again, bright sunshine as we set out to find the Bocca della Verita, or the Mouth of Truth – reputed to bite off the hand of liars. Both Belinda and I remained with our full count of limbs after the encounter – I will leave it again up to the reader to decide on the reputation of the ancient lie detector !

We then meandered back into the centre, eating lunch in a very crowded café, and revisiting the Pantheon – it was still as good as before. A trip through Piazza Navona and Campo de Flori were entertaining and we had a rest at home before venturing out for our last evening meal in Rome. We discovered by accident a Risotteria. It wasn’t cheap, but the food was superb, the staff lovely and the wine flowed nicely. Everything from the starters to the beer was rice based, and we enjoyed it all.

The final day dawned and we packed, locked up the apartment, and travelled to the train station. We left our bag in a left-luggage shop outside the station since the internal one had a huge queue which would have stressed me when it came to picking it up again. Our flight wasn’t until the evening, so we had the whole day to explore.

We went to Castel Sant’Angelo, which has been, in no particular order, Hadrian’s mausoleum, the Popes hide away, a location in the opera Tosca and is now a historical monument. A good place to visit and excellent views of Rome from the top. Coffee and ice-cream followed and then a walk along the river via Piazza de Popolo and then a small street full of expensive art shops and elegant people – we were very out of place.

Eventually we caught the train to the airport, checked in, found our flight was delayed (eventually by about 9 hours), and sat around the airport trying to doze. The delay was a pain, but didn’t detract from the holiday, and we eventually arrived home at about midday.

Bye for now !

We arrived into Geneva and found the hotel right next door to the station. The hotel was nice, if you like Scandi-Noir decor and no bar or restaurant 😀, but it really was OK and very convenient. We went for a walk to find somewhere for dinner, eventually sitting down outside a brasserie. The food was nice but was somewhat spoiled by the horn-honking antics of the hundreds of French drivers who drove past beeping their horns and calling out of the windows. I wasn’t impressed, but the waiter said that if he was French he would drive to the next country and do exactly the same, so we couldn’t blame them too much.

Slept well in our little part of 1970’s IKEA , and then made our way to meet the guide of our pre booked walking tour at 11:00. About 10 other people were there and we wandered around the old city of Geneva hearing about the Catholics and Protestants. Then we heard about the Protestants and the Catholics, then a bit later about Catholics and … Well, you get the idea. Not a lot has happened in Geneva, but even so, the tour was enjoyable.

After lunch we jumped on the number 18 tram and went about 6 miles north to CERN, the home of the Large Hadron Collider. The exhibitions were well done, informative and entertaining, but there really wasn’t anything that told you that the experiments were really happening under your feet. Still , at least we have been there.

Later that evening we took a water taxi across the lake (largest in Western Europe) then walked back to the hotel via a bar and a restaurant. I had a superb pizza and Belinda had a gluten free concoction that looked (and tasted) lovely. We then had an early night ready for the 7:30 train to Florence via Milan.

Got up early next day and caught the Eurostar to Paris. Very fast, very nice and we arrived refreshed into Gare de Nord, Paris. We then spent over 30 minutes trying to by a ticket for a 6 minute underground trip; next time I will listen to the train guard (and Belinda) and buy the metro ticket on the Eurostar !!

Took the Metro to Gare du Lyon and had a spot of lunch there including a gluten-free ice cream before boarding the next train, a TGV to Geneva. It sped through the French countryside and then slowed to crawl through the Alps, all the time the train guard keeping us abreast of the World Cup football, where France eventually beat Croatia 4:2.

We waved Lucia goodbye from the train station as she left for Paris via Southport. Merseyrail were having delays so we decided to get an earlier train and make sure we got to South Parkway in plenty of time. We did !

Trip down to London was uneventful, smooth and quick and we arrived at the Pullman hotel at around 2pm. They tried to charge us £35 over some mistake with the pricing, but since it wasn’t our fault, and they didn’t really know what had happened we said we wouldn’t pay. They offered us free breakfasts, but we stuck to our guns and saved the £35. We took the bus and then walked around Green Park, The Mall and near Westminster Abbey before we were diverted away from an anti-Trump march by some friendly police. We decided to return back to the hotel then, stopping on the way for a couple of pizzas – just practicing for when in Italy.